Otis Funkmeyer, The Ph.D. of Popping

So it’s a couple hours before my show and I am feeling this sort of malaise. I’m gonna write it out here because I find that this helps me and you all seem to find it valuable at times. I am creating now, on my path, doing my thing, and well, so what? My friend Tamara told me about this warehouse filled with boxed paintings that people had labored over and on and on and on and you get the drift. They’re all just in boxes in a nameless warehouse now. It feels a little meaningless.

On top of that, there’s this desire in me to do magnificent work, to do things of importance, to really transform the world. And here I am performing for a handful of people at a library in a small town in Bali. I understand that this is all some downer shit but it’s nice for me to share.

The real thing is the movie VV and I are working on. It’s finally hitting me that there are about an infinity number of ways to tell a story and stories to tell and it’s freaking me out and I want to tell a “good” story, a story that “matters,” and I’m finding it debilitating. But when I just let go and tell something that seems fun or good or nice, it feels so trivial that I’m kicked back into this meaninglessness thing.

So basically, I’m a little confused. I’m sure it will pass because it just came on right before I sat down to write anyway, but it feels important to me.

Do I even like to make movies? Why do I think I’m so important to transform the world? Does everyone want to do this? All I know is that it feels like a tight rope at the moment. If I get too self-important, I am debilitated and can’t enjoy anything and thus can’t create. But if I’m too self-unimportant and shits and giggles and all that, I am thrust into existentialism. So I’ll do my best to keep on keeping on.

Living a life of luxury has made me see that yes, a life of luxury is quite nice, and no, I’m not particularly attached to it. It seems to have nearly as many downsides as upsides, in the keeping up with the Jones’s sense of things.

I’m going to go back to joy now, thanks for listening:

I have to say that this is a surprising thing for me to be writing or speaking about or even interested in. This is not a subject that I remember fascinating me as a child and I have generally regarded myself as fairly dismissive of wild theories or non-materialistic matters.

Several years ago, I became interested in certain spiritual information that I later found out was “channeled.” Channeled information is that which is supposedly downloaded from some other consciousness when a meditative state is entered. The consciousness then speaks through the person channeling and says whatever they feel like saying.

What struck me so much about the information was how pertinent it was to my lived experience of life. Nothing airy-fairy, no catastrophic predictions or heralds of future spaceships, but the nuts and bolts of reality. How to be happy, how to be successful, how to enjoy yourself and your life. This is the type of information that I *have* always been interested in and so it was quite shocking when the information I found most resonating with me came from someone who claimed to be, in effect, a telephone for an alien.

At first, I tried to deny this or avoid it or just not think much about it. But after a while, it just felt like it was starting me in the face and it was something that I had to take a deeper look at. What I found is fascinating, exciting, and speaks to the shift that we as a humanity are right in the middle of, waking up to our galactic heritage and to a broader conception of ourselves, of reality, and of the universe we live in.

The information that I would like to share with you sounds straight out of a science fiction movie and the best answer I can come up with for that is: Where did the science fiction movies come from?

What is our imagination? Why did we even think of aliens? Why does this fascinate so many of us? Why do they make so many movies about these subjects? Why are we as a planet spending billions of dollars looking for signs that we’re not alone?

I would like to share some stories and present them as nothing more than thought experiments. Interesting ideas that at the very least are “cool” to ponder.

The reason that this subject has continued to interest me and why I find it worthy of getting up on a stage and discussing is that it has the possibility to awaken our imaginations, open our minds to possibilities that we had never considered. It dares us to think bigger, dream larger, see the world we abide in in a new way, and I think that all of this expansion leads us into a direction that we all deep down want to go in.

Towards hope, towards joy, towards community, towards harmony, and towards possibility.

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Here was the program for the second show I did. It was Wednesday and the theme was Mayan Cosmology. The shows have gone really well. The amazing thing is that I am *finally* having the courage to do what Bashar told me to do all along: do what is my highest joy, simply because it is my highest joy. Not because I think it will make me rich or famous or will pay the bills, but simply because it’s who I am.

I LOVE DOING THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING! Just get me on a stage, any stage, and I will do my spiel! And people are enjoying it! Next Monday’s show is on Extraterrestrial Existence. Improv Everytime (get it?).

I am really happy here, VV is here, life unfolds, I am thinking a lot about STORY and MYTHOLOGY and ARCHETYPES and ASTROLOGY these days and I have become a *MEAN* raw food chef. On the real.

Going to the gym a lot, getting a little buffness going on, it all just keeps unfolding. I am finally on the path that I always wanted to be on and it is a happy, happy, rewarding, fulfilling place to be:

I want to share with you tonight some of the things that I have
learned about Mayan cosmology. Growing up in a modern Western society,
the idea of cosmologies seems at best mythical and at worst the work
of cranks and primitives.

Hidden beneath this judgment is the ignorance of the fact that we too
have a cosmology of our own: a scientific, Catholic cosmology that was
constructed, not as God-given or absolute as it is presented to us to
be.

What this means is that we have a certain conception of time and how
this time plays out in our lives, on our Earth, throughout our solar
system and galaxy, and ultimately throughout the three-dimensional
universe in which we see ourselves abiding.

This is important because the cosmology that we subscribe to gives us
a certain sense (as do all cosmologies) of how life works, and perhaps
more specifically, how TIME works.

In our current cosmology, which I will refer to as Gregorian
cosmology, we have a conception of time that is focused on the Earth’s
rotation around the Sun. This is a very regular, linear rotation that
repeats every 365 “days,” where a day is seen to be the time it takes
from one sun rise to the next.

As we have all grown up under this cosmology, we are often ignorant of
the effect that it has on us, the world view that it engenders. I
would argue that this world view is one that views life as a linear,
random process where change is unpredictable and cycles continue
indefinitely.

The Mayans have a completely different cosmology, based around the
Earth’s rotation around not only the sun, but also around the Galactic
Center, which they refer to as Hunab Ku. Two important things follow
from this Mayan cosmology. The first is that we are part of a much
larger picture, a galactic picture. The second is that time is not a
linear process but is instead a fractalline process, where the same
cycles repeat, but at different intervals of time.

From this cosmology, the Mayans deduced that a great shift was to
occur when the Sun became conjunct (aligned) with the Galactic Center,
on the Winter Solstice in the year of 2012.

Their cosmology predicted a gradual awakening of consciousness to its
heritage beyond the Earth and the solar system, to its rightful home
at the center of the galaxy.

Scientists have found that it appears to be a black hole that resides
in the galactic center. This is interesting due to the fractal
mathematics involved.

If we take a piece of bread, and chop it in two, and then again, and
again, and again, we can continue this process infinitely if we have
instruments of sufficient precision. The piece of bread will become
infinitely small, though we will never reach a point where this is “no
bread.” This is basically how a black hole works. Matter is sucked
deeper and deeper into the hole, accelerating towards infinity, but
never reaching an end point. It is an infinite process of ever-faster
free-falling.

This is what the Mayan Calendar predicts will happen to consciousness.
The cycles will be split, infinitely smaller and smaller, as we
approach this alignment with the galactic center, until we are thrown
into speeds that approach infinity.

As we are currently locked in a cosmology that denies the reality of
fractal mathematics and infinite acceleration, this is a tough pill to
swallow. Thus, the systems based on Gregorian cosmology will have to
shift as we approach this time. Already, we are watching economies and
resources and systems that were viewed in a linear nature become
increasingly problematic, while at the same time, new systems, such as
the internet, that embrace this other cosmology, flourishing.

The purpose of this acceleration is awakening. Awakening to the
reality of who we really are and of the dream that we find ourselves
co-creating. It is an exciting time to be alive!

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So it is the night of my first show in Bali, my first paid show of my life. “Breakdancing, Aliens, and God” goes live tonight. My one-man show, fully improvised, fully alive, fully me.

I have decided, or more accurately been told, to write a handout each time I have a show for the audience and for myself to collect my thoughts about the theme of the show that night. This is the first handout.

Life here is miraculous. I have an amazing mansion, an amazing raw food chef on staff, and an amazing life and career and friends. And my wonderful girlfriend VV comes into town tomorrow.

Life continues to unfold, very improvisationally:

Improvisation as a way of life. A philosophy. That is the idea we are after. Improvisation is the natural way of, well, nature, and I would posit life itself. The tree doesn’t wonder how the rain is going to come just as the lion doesn’t wonder where it will find its prey. Nature just lives. We too just live. We go about our days and do things and other things happen and nearly everyday we think, wow, that was different than I expected.

But many of us are afflicted with the idea of planning. Not only with the idea of planning but with the idea that this is a good thing, an important thing, an essential component of success and happiness. Let’s clear up some terminology. I understand that it takes action to get things done and that if you don’t know what you want, you will have a difficult time of getting there. I would simply say that the combination of dreaming and acting is a more effective combination than that of planning and acting.

The world is changing rapidly, more than I think most of us, myself included, can possibly conceptualize. The internet-led technological revolution is sweeping over the world and destroying all systems that we have known since the Industrial Revolution. The pace is already fast and it is rapidly accelerating. It is a very difficult idea to picture what the world will look like in 10 years, let alone 20 or 50 or 100.

There is a reason behind this. When we have a sense of what the future might hold, our analytical, left-brain kicks in and thinks it knows best how to get the job done. The truth is that the situations where the left brain is superior to the right brain are fewer and fewer. Being a quantum computer, the right brain can just pop out answers to questions of even a scientific or factual nature. Of course, the left brain might reject these ideas because they don’t have a logic that can be followed, but that is the whole point.

Life doesn’t have a logic that can be followed, in the left brain sense of that word.

Where we are headed is toward an entirely new conception of reality, of ourselves, and of the dance we are being danced. The Mayan Calendar posits that acceleration will reach a point where there are a nearly infinite number of new things happening in the world at the same time.

As we approach this object, what Terrence McKenna refers to as the Transcendental Object at the End of Time, we will find that our best laid plans are laid to waste more than ever. We will no longer be able to predict with even a remote sense of certainty what even the near future holds.

There is a reason for all of this. We are falling out of time and back into nature, back into ourselves, and back into creation and existence itself. And the method that this all works on is improvisation.

It is a beautiful thing, this improvisation, and I am so happy to share it and what it means to me with you all.

Synchronistically, on the night of my first show, I received this quote as I went to write this:
“A very good career choice would be to gravitate toward those activities and to embrace those desires that harmonize with your core intentions, which are freedom and growth—and joy. Make a “career” of living a happy life rather than trying to find work that will produce
enough income that you can do things with your money that will then make you happy. When feeling happy is of paramount importance to you—and what you do “for a living” makes you happy—you have found the best of all combinations.”

Live your dreams my friends. Let your dreams become your reality and improvise your way through life. You are loved! You are love itself! I love you!

From the bottom of my heart to the bottom of yours,
Otis

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So let’s see what’s happened since my intention to work hard.

The first day, which was Sunday, was quite a powerful day for me. I worked on a website for about 8 hours and the whole time felt really good about the process. Then, I went out and street performed for an hour, came back and ate, and then went out for another hour.

It was a definite breakthrough for me in that it was the first time I went out and I was truly not afraid of performing. I set up my box in front of a large group of people (another previous fear) and just started dancing. It went moderately well financially, but I had a great time doing it. I practiced some things I had been wanting to work on and I just focused on connecting with people and sending out joy.

Then yesterday I headed back out again to perform and the fear hit hard! I showed up at Union Square and for the first time was going to have the primo location. There were over 100 people standing around and I took a little walk to steady myself and calm down. When I came back, the spot was taken. And so the story ends. Act now or forever hold your peace I suppose.

Either way, I am finding this hard work thing to be as hard as it seems. I went to bed late last night but my intuition said to get up at 8AM this morning. I didn’t set an alarm and woke up at 8 just like that *snaps fingers*. I got out of bed and just got hit with a wave of lethargy and I got back into bed. As I was lying there, I realized that a huge part of my life is spent hanging out, talking, researching, thinking. Not filled with “doing.” I picture Jeremy Pivens’ character on “Entourage,” running around, making deals, calling people, making things happen. This has not been my tendency as a way to live. I’ve been more passive, allowing things to just sort come as they may.

So I’m excited about more activity but at the same time I’m finding a lot of resistance appearing, because the activity leads to wanting to do things that I’m afraid of–contacting people, putting myself out there in various ways, making difficult decisions.

Either way, I’m committed to it and now I’m headed out to street perform again.

I’m not sure what the purpose of this experiment was today. I feel a little hazy as to why I wanted to do this so much and why it was so challenging, but it’s probably a similar phenomenon to how you can’t watch yourself grow taller. It’s too much a part of you.

I’m really grateful though. I am intending to have a lot of work on my plate, to be working morning to night, being on the phone (another fear), having to go out into the world and make things happen. I intend increased activity and increased discipline.

Technorati Tags: street performing, hard work, dedication, perseverence, 30 day challenge, big black brit, britwolfson, brit wolfson

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So the signs are all around me. As I woke up today and took a little morning walk, I saw 2 guys going through the trash, pulling out all of the recyclables from each trash bin. When I came back, they were still there, working hard. Yesterday, I had some errands to run and I passed a guy my age, looked kind of like me, asking for change. A few hours later, I was out again and there he was, still there, still asking for change. Working hard.

I wrote a friend last year that the universe was trying to tell him to work hard. Ever since I wrote that letter, I always had this weird feeling about it. Like maybe I had sent it to the wrong person. Like maybe the actual intended recipient was me.

Yesterday was a tough day. I spent much of the day thinking about the past and mostly about the future, where my life is headed, uncertain, confused, head awash with ideas. I worked on the Ordinary Miracles website with V V and she showed me some other websites as reference for what she was looking for. I told her, very defensively, that these websites were beyond what I knew how to do and that she was asking too much. After this conversation, I spent more time looking at these websites and had a bit of a revelation.

My whole life, especially my adult life, from one perspective has been about me thinking that I am so good, so talented, so capable. So entitled that I didn’t have to work hard. And it dawned on me suddenly that no matter how talented I am, even if i am Einstein incarnate, my talent is not ever going to be able to compete with the hard work of others.

Realistically, honestly, I probably work on average 5 to 10 hours per week. And there is just no way that this is going to compare to the work of someone who works 5 to 10 hours per day. I have justified this by spending much of my time looking for shortcuts–ways to do things faster, ways to cut corners, ways to modify other people’s work so that I don’t have to do as much.

But the whole thing is rotten at the core. To live the life I want to live, to provide real value to other people, to earn a good living, all requires hard work. And I have been so averse to hard work that I have quit just about everything I have tried when the going got tough. Sports, mathematics, video editing, street performing. It really runs the gamut.

And so I’m really grateful for this lesson and this realization because up until now I was truly blind to it. If I spend a day working for eight hours, I congratulate myself for a month and take it easy. I can only imagine what is possible if this were to just be the norm, working hard everyday out of habit if nothing else.

On top of that, I realize that so much of my confusion, so much of my money worries, so much of the time I spend living in the past and future is little more than a way to avoid the present, where there are many things on my plate, all of which require hard work to actually achieve. And the time I spend worrying and confused and uncertain is time spent in my own unique way of procrastination, avoiding the work in front of me.

Now, I say all of this with no judgment on myself. I was truly blind to this aspect of myself and of reality. And now it is a brand new moment and a brand new chance to do things differently. My dream is to be a performer and this is yet another thing that requires incredibly hard work. I realized that I spend much of the time complaining about my genetic defects and lack of flexibility and strength. But as I look back, those few times where I have really put in the work to stretch and exercise, I have gotten great results. The problem was that I only kept up the work for about a week at a time.

I street performed for about a half-hour yesterday. I went out on Saturday at 10 AM. There were very few people around and those that were there seemed completely disinterested. I got very discouraged by this and quit. I read a story yesterday about a professional violinist, a guy who had played in the New York Philharmonic, the largest stages in the world. He decided to take a year off and street perform around the world, financing his trip solely by street performing. He succeeded, and said that on an average day, he began performing at 6AM and worked until midnight. I truly, at this point in the development of my belief systems, can not even fathom working 18 hours a day. It doesn’t even compute. But these are the people who are living the dream I want to live. This is what it seems like they all do. What they all have in common is a lot of hard work. Work that sucks as well as work that is gratifying.

I am scared that if I really work hard on this website that it won’t be that good. That people will finally see what I am capable of and they won’t be very impressed. And I think that this is the fear that underlies them all. The fear that my self-image of being so talented and competent will shatter in the face of reality. So why give it a chance? Just coast through life and say you haven’t seen what I’m really capable of, yet.

So I commit myself today to working hard and doing my best, whether the work sucks or feels great. Because sensations change, things feel good and then things feel bad, but there is always chop wood, carry water.

Technorati Tags: street performing, hard work, dedication, perseverence, 30 day challenge, big black brit, britwolfson, brit wolfson

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So this post covers Saturday to Tuesday. The interesting thing that all of those days have in common is that they are all days that I did not go out and street perform. And I’m ok with that. I guess this is a lesson that not every challenge will end with a 100%-success-checkmarked-report-card, even though I feel like a 100% success internally.

I could give lots of reasons that I didn’t go out and street perform, everything from the great old friends I saw in Staten Island to the immense amount of creative output that has been flowing through me, but at some fundamental level it was the fear again.

My old friend. In this arena of performing, I’m beginning to almost befriend my fear. My old companion, how have you been? I’m seeing that after the excitement of jumping over one hurdle, oh look, another hurdle! Just like that! Like clockwork. But each fear is a little more expansive, is built on the previous success, is pulling me toward an even greater expansion.

And the new fear is definitely engaging people, talking to them, motivating them, dancing with them, teaching them, hugging them, loving them, laughing with them. And hey, I think it’s pretty understandable. I don’t see a lot of other people out on the subway doing that (as in 0), so we’re getting farther out on the ledge now.

But at the same time, I’m really excited. Because I know that one day (maybe even tomorrow!) I will come back with a glowing report of how I really did it, I really did it, I engaged people, they liked me, they loved me! That someone came up and thanked me for what I said. That someone gave me a really tender hug. That there was this one moment where I just let it all out and was free and really danced and people were clapping and screaming. I can see it and feel it clearly. And I know at the same time, that’s a lot of energy for me to muster. It’s something I’ve never done in this context. And as much as I can type about it excitedly, actually going out there and doing it has thus far eluded me.

But I’m a survivor my man. I am not giving up. I am going out swinging. So I feel good. I feel like loving myself for what I’ve already accomplished. I really wasn’t sure in January if I was ever going to be able to do this at all, and now I’m right in the middle of it. It’s a good feeling. I think my next 30-day challenge may actually be 30 days of self-love and complete self-acceptance. Because it feels like this is what this challenge is pushing me toward. Because it’s not easy, and it’s not easy to “fail” and then report on your failure. We live in a society that likes winners.

Anyway, that’s my spiel. I made my first drawing since I was probably 12 years old on Sunday and finished it today. I *REALLY* enjoyed making it. It was exactly what I wanted to draw. I took that drawing class and they taught me how to draw things realistically and I didn’t like it at all. It was so formulaic. I felt like an architect or something. Like a scientist. I thought it was supposed to be magical. Well, making this was magical. I fully intend to develop this style further and further, making it trippier and trippier and trippier and more and more geometrical and fractalline as I go, because that is what I love, tripping and geometry and fractals (which of course are geometry themselves).

Delving into all of these forms of art has really been helping me discover what I like. It’s so easy for me to know what I like in drawing, but much harder in dancing. But the knowledge and confidence I achieve in one transfers directly to the next, in a way that you can’t get in any other way.

So here’s my drawing:

I call it “Alien Dreamtime” in honor of my favorite guy ever in the history of guys, Terence McKenna. Love you Terence!

I’ve also written about 5 new songs, wrote the outline for my new one-man show which is probably about a year away from taking a form that could be presented, wrote a story that I ultimately want someone to animate, and learned a ton of new stuff about Photoshop (like how to make stuff like this), and worked on the treatment for the Ordinary Miracles script. I want to take this time also to give myself credit for the vast explosion in creativity that I have experienced in the past year. It is what I said I want and it is definitely what I am experiencing. I intend to collaborate more. I’d like to have a band/rap group/musical experiment. So I’m excited to see how that comes together.

By the way, Bashar is big on March 15 aka the Ides of March being a major major portal for visitations from past societies on Earth. Did anyone experience anything like this? I had a weird experience with what felt like a 30 foot needle being removed from my sacral chakra, but I didn’t really associate it with a past society (boy I have sure gone off the Western culture deep end to write about 30 foot needles being removed from sacral chakras with a straight face). But let me know if in recollection anything interesting happened to your on or around Saturday.

Here’s the vlog:

And I bid you adieu.

Technorati Tags: terence mckenna, britwolfson, brit wolfson, alien, breakdancing, street performing, busking, challenge

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So, another day, another day, another day. Today was a new kind of learning experience. I had my music and I went out and there were huge crowds (it was about 10:30AM) and people were really watching and I was really dancing and I made mad loot straight off the bat and I was dancing hard and within an hour it was just over. I was zonked and so tired I didn’t even have the energy to do anything worth paying for.

So the lesson there was that I can’t just dance hard. I’m getting pushed toward making my show, which will push me toward preaching. I’m basically being pushed toward opening my mouth, which I still have been too scared to do! I love the way life works when I write, when I can sit back and analyze it rather than being caught up in the emotional maelstrom of it.

Life is just constantly pushing you toward what you are deep down “supposed to be doing” because when you don’t do that, it just never works out exactly right. For instance, if i had just talked more and danced less, I could have gone much longer and stayed as long as I had hoped to. As Bashar has always done said, if you aren’t getting 100% results, you can be guaranteed you aren’t doing it 100%.

But that’s OK, cuz I’m ok, and I don’t have to be ready to do it 100%, and by the time I do do “it” 100%, “it” will shift and there will be another new thing that I will be too scared to do at 100%. And so it continues, on and on and on and on.

I just read that Jung said that… might as well just look it up… yah, so Jung said, “Enlightenment is not imagining figures of light but making the darkness conscious.” So life is just a perfect formula for making darkness conscious. It just makes you want to do everything that is dark, and urges you gently, then stronger, then stronger, then stronger, and then eventually if you don’t do it, it just blows up your whole life and you are such a wreck that doing that thing doesn’t even seem like such a big deal anymore.

No wonder I do the puppet dance so much! Whenever I’m comfortable enough to admit it, I really do think of myself as not much more than a puppet. Voices in my head tell me to do things or ideas magically pop into my head of things that would be exciting, and then the monkey-suit starts machinating.

So anyway, it was a good day, another new learning experience, many ups and downs, and I made enough money to buy myself a tea and cookie at Barnes & Noble.

The simple things in life.

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Another eh day following an exciting day of growth. I was super manic last night and stayed up all night doing various things and then slept all day. By the time I woke up, it was dark and my energy and enthusiasm were low. I went out anyway, and all of the spots were taken at Bedford, Union Square, and 6th Ave. Technically, I could have just started dancing along with one of the guitar players, but I didn’t have it in me tonight. I felt discouraged and that’s that.

I’m still moving forward with this, and tomorrow is a new day.

It’s funny. I was hoping for this challenge (like all things I do) to be so inspiring to everyone. How this guy was so afraid and he immediately just overcame all of his fears and transformed into a whole new person and inspired them all by how brave and courageous he was. And well, then life came along

Onward ho.

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Like Ice Cube said, I gotta say it was a good day. About midway through the day I didn’t think so, but life showed me otherwise. I feel so proud, really, truly, I do. I went out at 2:30 and performed for about 2 hours.

I honestly think I can say I changed someone’s life. I think I may never hear about it, but I can feel it as I write it. I really went for it and was free and had fun.

When I moved to New York, I spent 12 hours in the subway one day warming up and getting acclimated to the whole situation. One of the things I noticed was that, much to my chagrin, there were huge groups of kids all the time at the Bedford station. These huge packs of black and latino teenagers that were so loud and so obnoxious and so just about making fun of everything and thinking things were stupid.

I was scared that they would make fun of me. And I realized that deep down, I have always feared rejection by black people. That if I was just me, just talked me, just acted like, just danced like me, that black people would make fun of me for how uncool and white I was. I have taken great strides in this department over the years, but at my core, I still believed it. And straight out the hood, black and latino teenagers probably topped that list, especially since teenagers of all races can be so annoying and so quick to make fun of things.

Anyway, at one point I had 50 teenagers surrounding me who were totally into me and what I was doing and we were cracking jokes and having fun and I was battling them at dancing and they were screaming at how good I was and on and on and on. The weirdest part was that out of the $10 I made in 2 hours (NOT BAD HUH!!?), I think half of it was from black and latino teenagers, the people who I would assume from my white middle-class perspective would be the people least likely to give me money.

So that was really, ya know, touching.

I also had my first voice lesson tonight which was really great and I totally hit it off with my teacher and then she was playing in this *CRAZY* band tonight at Zebulon. I can honestly say it was THE STRANGEST MUSIC I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. It ultimately took me into a parallel dimension it was so dischordant and aharmonic. You should seriously just listen to their songs to trip out at how weird it is. And the conductor dude is SOOOOO into it, he was this total inspiration and made me realize the border between creative genius and completely insane person is basically completely subjective.

So a really good day, a day of growth.

And on top of that, I took 8 of the 10 dollars I made (need $2 to get into the subway tomorrow) and took myself out for some really nice Thai food. It felt so good to go out to eat with the money that I made street performing.

It really did.

LOVE YOU ALL!

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So I wrote and recorded another song today. I am having my first voice lesson on Monday with a woman I found on craigslist. Here is the song and you can even BUY IT from this very widget right here:

It is a weird thing making these songs because when I hear them a few hours after I made them sometimes they sound to me like someone doing a parody–like something you’d see on SNL of someone who can’t sing. But it’s funny, I like them. I like listening to them pretty much as much as listening to Jack Johnson or The Beatles. Cuz it’s MY SONG. This goes right in line with what Terrence McKenna has to say about reclaiming your mind and creating your OWN culture. i.e. Listening to songs and videos you made with your friends has its own innate joy that you can not get from someone else’s creativity.

Anyway, enough of my high-falutin’ ideas. Here’s the first Dance of Reckless Abandon. 5 minutes of uncut Youtube madness:

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