from Charisma Arts
I will relate a quick story from my own life that helped
prove to me the power contained in presenting a warm vibe. One
day, not long ago, I was asked to accompany a woman to a
wedding reception. She was looking forward to her friends and
family meeting her date. But on the day of the wedding I was not
feeling particularly social. My extroverted side comes and goes in
streaks. But I wanted to make a good impression and be a good
date. Socialization was impossible to avoid.
I formulated a plan. I would act over-the-top warm and
friendly upon meeting people. I theorized that maybe this would
excuse me from the responsibility of being involved in
conversation.
That night I followed my plan. I didn’t just shake hands
with strangers; I clasped them on the shoulder. I hugged
grandmas, nieces and trophy wives. I told people that I liked
them and then I shut up.
This produced surprising results. A few days later I was told
that I was the hit of the wedding. My date said, “All the guests
thought you were a great conversationalist.†I was dumbfounded.
I hadn’t said much of anything.
This was both insightful and humbling. I used to think
people liked me for my witty remarks and intelligent
conversation. But it turns out they mostly like me for accepting
and loving them.
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